1,039 Dirty Rotten Slappy Hours
by SaintOfAllTheSinners
Summary: One thousand thirty-nine Dirty Rotten Slappy Hours is a story that I'm creating based off of Green Day lyrics. (Almost NSFW... Or NSFW not sure)
1. Introduction to DRSH

Introduction to 1,039 Dirty Rotten Slappy Hours:

1,039 Dirty Rotten Slappy Hours (Nice title, right?) Is a story I'm writing myself. I'm not sure how long it'll be, or how good it'll be either. It's based off of Green Day lyrics from all of their albums. I hope you enjoy my story, please follow it if you like it!


	2. Chapter 1: First Hours of Love

1,039 Dirty Rotten Slappy Hours:

Maria was always a little bit off. Ever since her parents passed due to cancer, she had lived with her grandparents, and used old words that no one seemed to understand. Nowadays, she was "normal", or as normal as a teenage girl could get, but she seemed to have a personality that no one knew about. One boy, Johnny, had always wanted to get into her mind, find out who she really was.

Point of view: Johnny

First day of summer vacation, and I was ready. Maria just moved from her old place to just down to street, and I was ready to find out who she really was on the inside. We were both seventeen, and I wanted to know her for who she was, and maybe even get lucky. I remember walking over to her house and ringing her doorbell. When she answered, all she was wearing was short shorts, a blue Lacoste, and knee socks. "Johnny!" She hugged me. It was strange, considering that we were only just becoming friends. "Come in." Maria lived with her uncle now, her grandparents died a while back. Her uncle was next to never home, so she basically lived by herself. I came in and sat on her couch beside her. "So... What've you been doing?" She looked at me and replied, "What since I saw you yesterday? Not much... Hey, do you want your Lacoste back?" I was confused. "M... My Lacoste?" "Yeah, remember last weekend, when you came over and that soda exploded all over the place?" I did remember. The soda had gotten all over my shirt, so I took it off. Apparently, I forgot it there. "Oh right. Sure." Maria pulled off the shirt, to reveal that she wasn't wearing anything underneath. Maria never seemed to give two fucks. Shirtless, she tossed me the Lacoste and sat back down. "Johnny, I like you. Let's stay friends. Please, don't change." "Why would I change? Only time I changed was when I became an atheist. East Jesus Nowhere." Maria shrugged. "I know, I'm an atheist too. Same reason. So contradictory. At some stupid baby ritual-" "Christening?" "-yeah, that. Anyway, the guy was like 'Keep an open mind, blah fucking blah'. Two seconds later, he says 'People's problem is that they think too much.' I mean, if your gonna preach, make sense." I agreed with her. She was so similar to me. She sat there on the couch, her knees up to her bare breasts. "Do you ever wonder how these religions started?" I replied, "I guess people didn't know that science was a thing, and they assumed everything was magically just there, they needed some sort of explanation, so deities were the way to go." Maria put her feet on the floor. She spoke without covering herself. She must've been really comfortable with me. "I guess I never thought of that. I always assumed that they just made it up becuase they had no one to follow, no leader. Hey, this's getting wierd. Let's do something." I could tell that I was red in the face. I definitely took that the wrong way at first. Her golden blonde hair ran down to her chest, and her bright green eyes glimmered in the light of the flickering light that sat in the corner of her living room. "Like what?" I asked, attempting to hide the fact that my face was the color of a bright, ripe apple. Maria looked up. "Hey, There's something cool I want to show you!" She got up off of the couch and ran up the stairs. I followed close behind, leaving the Lacoste on the couch. Maybe I'd keep forgetting it until it was hers? Upstairs, I followed her into her room. In the corner sat a beaten up piano, with some yellow, stained sheets of music. She fiddled with the keyboard and looked at me. "Do you know how to read sheet music?" As a matter of fact, I did. My mother had taught me when I was seven how to read music, and later how to play piano. "Yeah, let me teach you." I sat beside her, and taught her the basics of reading music. "Every Good Boy Does Fine." Maria giggled. "What's the matter?" Maria smiled at me. She said, "It's funny, all this time I thought you were teaching me piano, now you sound like a catholic priest!" I laughed with her. "Maria, I like you. Don't you change either." "Deal." We shook hands, but then she jumped up and hugged me. This must've been one of the strangest situations I'd ever been in. Here I was, sitting in front of a dirty piano, with Maria standing up in front of me, hugging me with my face in her breasts. I thought my face was just beginning to turn back to it's normal color, but instead it became a deeper red. "Maria! You just shoved your tits in my face!" She looked down at me. "I don't care, why should you?" She was right, I didn't mind. We talked for an hour or so, until eventually, my heart burnt like the fires of what some call hell. "MARIA, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU-" Her uncle stormed into the room. It was then that I realized how bad this looked. We were sitting on her bed facing each other, and she was topless. I stood up. "I swear, It's not what it-" Her uncle approached me with his fists clenched. At this point, I stood up and got the fuck out of there. Once I was outside, I could hear Maria's uncle yelling at her about sex, drugs, the usual bullshit that parents like to scare their kids with. I sat outside, remembering the fact that I left the Lacoste in there. Her uncle was sure to come across it and flip. I had to hide it. I slipped through the door and snuck over to the couch. I grabbed the Lacoste and then contemplated taking it. It smelled just like her, but then again, I also planned on leaving it there, and continuing to do so every time I saw her. I dropped it behind the couch, assuming she'd look back there for some reason. I ran down the street to my house, and for whatever reason, my parents were home. I always hated it when they got home, they usually worked all day, but today they decided it was a good day to come home early and make me angry. They loved me, they really did. Only problem was that every time they came home, they were pissed off from working all day. I came in and immediately headed from my room. I could hear that they were complaining in their bedroom about work, which usually indicated that they wouldn't come out for an hour or so. I headed across the room to my computer, which I had strategically placed with the monitor facing the wall so that my parents couldn't tell what I was doing. I plugged in my webcam and logged into Skape, a video calling service. I then called my good friend James, who I knew I could trust. As soon as he answered, I decided it was good to start by saying "So Maria just shoved her boobs in my face." James stared at me. "Dude, you're in." "In what?" "Well, considering that she just shoved her tits in your face, that probably means that she likes you. A lot. Let's just she doesn't end up like Gloria." Gloria was a girl who I dated for a few months a few years ago. She disappeared randomly, and no one ever heard from her again. She left hints as to where she went, something about how she was againt the government and other shit like that. "Yeah, that would suck. I really like Maria. Only problem is, her uncle's pretty sure that I was about to fuck her right then and there, because she wasn't wearning a shirt." James laughed. "Again- You're in."

{Chapter End}


End file.
